prioritize! 124 lbs. tomorrow is day one.

i weighed 124 lbs this morning.
122 during the day.
i dont even wanna check the scale.
i dont want to see my failure written in numbers.

okay.
so i refuse to let this post go morbid.
I had to eat today with my family and i absolutely COULD NOT get out of it.
my mom kept bringing up my eating so i didnt exactly have a choice but to eat. the fuck up of my newly proclaimed fast [decided the second i stepped on the scale] caused nothing but a big huge binge today.

the good news is ive decided that im done with food.
completely done with it.
im giving it up.
like a meth addiction.
or any other addiction for that matter.
i have to give it up before it kills me.
and the best way is cold turkey.

so tomorrow will be the first day of my new life.
no more food, just liquid.
i will live off of orange juice, apple cider, water, coffee, and tea.

it actually ahs a lot of options.

i get 1/4th of an apple a day IF ABSOLUTELY NEEDED TO KEEP FROM BINGING.
and i love the number 14 now.
its my new favorite number.
fuck 45/65 i like 14.
so thats the amount ill eat.
14 calories a day if needed.
only when needed.

according to this website:
http://www.caloriesperhour.com/index_loss.php

If i eat 14 calories, and in my lifestyle i burn an average of 2226 calories a day without exercise, then i will be at my goal weight in 28 days if i dont binge and if i use 123 lbs as my starting weight.

does 28 days seem like a lot to you?
it doesnt seem like much to me.

to think that i can be beautiful,
NO.
that i can be STUNNING.

in less than a month makes me want to cry tears of joy.

okay.
thats it.

tomorrow is day one.
im doing this.
im so doing this.

i WILL be thin.
ill do it if it kills me.

and B will regret taking forever to text me and not asking me to hang out today even though i was busy all day shopping for clothes and being at the movies.

did i mention i bought clothes today?
loads of them.
and i bought a shirt and a pair of shorts a size too small so they can be my celebratory outfit the day i reach my goal =]

i even have shoes to match it.

im so doing this.

tomorrow is officially day one. im marking it in my day planner too.

im so going for this.

i hope all of you reach your goals as much as i hope i reach mine.



XOXO Sophia Ruins <3