Buh-Leem-Eyah

so since i got back home from the trip last sunday, today marks exactly 4 days my parents managing to be civil to each other.
all that was blown at around 4 this morning when my asshole stepdad stopped putting on a show and went back to being who he was.

for some reason, my mom was actually surprised.

i [stupidly] attempted to explain to them that their problems would not go away until they themselves changed.

the problem isnt the situation, the problem is them.

but theyre still running around like 6 year olds screaming and crying, and im still trying to ignore it all.

ive got my own things to stress about thanks.


speaking of,

im not doing well with the weight thing.

this morning i decided today i would eat normally, and then the second i finished eating breakfast, i raced to the bathroom to see that my weight was up to a whopping 123 lbs and i had a nice little panic attack.
after that i succeeded in making myself thrown up, because i really cant make up my mind about what im going to do.

hellllooooo bulimia! =D


sarcasm people, sarcasm.

im not serious.

im pretty sure i cant handle stomach acid enough to be bulimic, and after seeing the picture of a dead girl bent over a toilet once who died [while throwing up] in direct effect of being bulimic, its safe to say its not my thing.


another thing ive found recently is that posting seems a lot more forced than it used to. i never really know what to say, and im almost having trouble wording things.



hmm.





XOXO Sophia Ruins <3