Okay so I know I haven't posted in forever, but ive been SUPER busy lately.
Since my last post ive been fasting during the days and limiting my intake to 100-200 during the nights. Yesterday I binged, though it wasnt too bad since it was all on healthy stuff [salads, low cal yogurt, carrots, etc.] so im not too worried about it. Today ive done pretty terrible but tomorrow im planning on going back to fasting.
On a negative note, ive lost absolutely no weight [aka, lost 2 lbs then gained it back] which sucks. Im trying REALLY hard to not to let the lack of weight loss thing get to me.
My measurements are the same as when I was in the mid 120's though so I think it might just be water weight thats got me up to 128. [yep, thats right. 128. disgusting.]
Maybe my body just needs to get used to the weird intake? I plan on upping my exercise as soon as I get the time.
Ive been working like a maniac lately, and Ive met a REALLY amazing guy.
Like.. REALLY fucking amazing.
I've known him for a long time, but recently weve gotten closer.
We get along great and everything is really fantastic but he lives super far away.
Weve been talking every night this week until insane hours so ive been running on empty for a while.
Im really sorry about not posting for such a long time.
Oh and Jessica Jones:
Thank you a lot for the offer, and I would love to participate in the documentary but I don't really feel like I have any right to speak about an eating disorder that I don't really think I have anymore.
That and im not really pro-ana anymore. Im more or less pro-choice. [no, not referring to abortion stuff here.] By pro-choice I mean I think that if someone wants to starve themselves to death, then they're going to do it regardless of your opinions on it. Im not saying you should just let someone die, but if someone wants help, then they need to do it for themselves because if they do it for someone else, then the problem isnt going to be solved.
On the other hand, if someone thinks that this lifestyle is awful, fucked up, and un-healthy, then by all means, they can continue to think that. Just as long as no one shoves their ideals and beliefs down my throat or anyone elses.
[I personally still have a love/hate relationship with my eating disorder.]
But yeah anyways, feel free to let me know when the documentary is airing, id love to watch it.
In other news, titties [step-dad] is back in the house. I chewed my mom out for it and made her feel like shit, then she just bawled her eyes out and was depressed for a while. Yeah it made me feel bad, but hey the truth is the truth. There's nothing I can do about her lack of spine.
Haven't been drinking at all lately since I haven't really had the time to. The depression thing hasn't been to bad either.
So yeah, all in all i've been pretty good.
I promise to post more regularly<3
XOXO Sophia Ruins <3
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Glad you're back dearie!
ReplyDeleteyay your back!!!
ReplyDeletei agree that your body just needs some more time to adjust to the new intake. it may take a good couple of weeks for your body to get used to it. hang in there because your doing great. its great that you binged on healthy stuff, i love it when i can binge on a salad and feel satisfied, like ive eaten something terrible but really im just helping myself.
that sucks about titties, but ehh, ive been there with my mom and lets face it, some women are too weak to leave the shitty men they're with. you just need to keep reminding her how crappy of a guy he is and how she deserves someone as great as her.
stay strong
meg