Okay.
So im still feeling unstable [emotionally] and i still dont know why. I vaguely remember this being the reason i decided i wanted to eat like a normal human being and why I basically said fuck-being-underweight when I was with my family last summer.
I fasted yesterday, then ended my fast around 11 at night with half a cup of oatmeal [75 calories] and a brownie.
I took a shower and purged all the oatmeal [congratulations to me] and had the brownie much later that night. [and left it alone].
Afterwards, i felt so horrible guilty about eating that brownie that I did 200 jumping jacks then hid under my blankets till I fell asleep.
Im still convinced that theres no way that brownie could have been 110 calories.
Even though that brownie caused me torment last night, I still plan on leaving an open window so I can have another one today.
My weight this morning was STILL 127.0.
I think im going to just stop weighing myself for the next few days.
Oh and I watched "Living With Size Zero" last night, but it wasn't all that great.
Im also re-reading Wasted.
XOXO Sophia Ruins <3
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I'm feeling exactly the same way. It's the winter, I swear- there was no particular reason why, but I felt like complete shit today, even though I have no reason to.
ReplyDeleteSleep it off, drink water, take a shower and wash it away. :) You're so strong, you'll be fine.
xo
Victoria
I think i know how you feel. Like how victoria says, Winter is just NOt my time. Summer i can fast like a goddess. Winter is just bleh. Some Ana's love it, personally i don't. I hope you lose some lbs once you weigh yourself again. Sometimes steping off the scale is the best thing to do. Good Luck xx
ReplyDeletedont worry, i know your strong enough to pull through this. i know ive had to step away from the scale too. it seems like no matter what, most of us are bound to put on a few pounds during the winter months unless we all stuck to the boot camp but i mean, who has really made it all the way through that. your doing great. you need to decide what will make you happy. ill be here for you for whatever you decide.
ReplyDeletestay strong
meg
hey don't worry.
ReplyDeletewhat i do is avoid the scale for a couple days so that i dont become upset when i see a number i dont like.
and its such a coincidence because last night i was watching live with size zero too haha
stay strong!
xoxo
skinny sasha
wow. i miss winter. it motivates me! I hate summer in Australia right now. So what are you going to do about this plateau?You need some interest in your life or something? Like more passion?
ReplyDeleteTry STARVED, a serires. It's gross, though. Catch it on youtube.
ReplyDeleteI'm reading wasted.