today was exactly what i needed.

okay, so i didnt fast like i was going to, because ive had a total change in plans.

i got up this morning, and was 122 llbs.
i felt horrible.

so today i had a crepe [i was terrified of the cals it could have had but turns out it only has 143 cals which isnt bad for all tht taste] and i had another and made it last all day.
so today i had 286 cals because i ate two but im deffinitely feelin the hunger pains since my metabolism have revved up so much.

jumped on the scale like five minutes ago after eating all day,
and i swear i almost had a seizure on the scale.

i weigh 119.

yes.

its a blessing.
a miracle.
a sign from god.

who other than me looses 2 llbs in a day while feasting on crepes?

i have to keep going. if i want a future, if i want a career, if i want to have everything i want, then i have to keep going.

my mom was 5'7 and my dad was 6'4.
even though im only 5'6 and my 16th b-day is on the 31st i tlked to my doctor and he said is till have A LOT to grow, which really made my day.
ive been stressing because theres no way in hell im getting into the modeling industry to only work commercial.

high fashion is where my heart is and i deff need to grow [and loose weight] if i plan to pursue my career in the modeling industry.


so,

absolute thinspo.
i could go a month without eating after i watched this:



and this almost made me throw up. not for the weak stomached people.








the girls with the cakes at the end almost make me cry it was so disgusting





last but not least:

mmm thinspo