im soooooo fucking annoyed.
no, this time its not weight related.
this time, im pissed off because i get to sit in the house all day, while the rest of my family goes out and does stuff.
i got up this morning, and hey look at that, theyre all gone again. call them and ask where they are, and they tell me that they went out to go eat, go clothes shopping [AGAIN] for my little sister, and then they were going to go watch a movie.
i ask them wtf they didnt invite me for, and they give me this bullshit:
"well we didnt think youd wanna go since we were going out to eat."
excuse me?
oh you thought that since i dont like food, that MUST mean that i also dont like movies or clothes right?
what fascinating logic!
how about, fuck this shit.
its been exactly 30 days that ive been sitting in the same house, doing the same things, and going slowly insane.
sure, my friends come over once in a while to see me, but we all know that theyre tired of asking me to go out with them when my parents say no anyways.
and this is NOT the first time my family has gone to go do fun shit and left me in the house by myself with N O T H I N G to do.
its insanely stupid.
ok rant over.
so wednesday morning, [i started this fast wednesday] i checked my weight so i could just see how much i lose by the end of the fast, and i weighed 125. yes, a whopping 125.
and this morning, i weigh 121 lbs.
so 4 lbs in one day.
i think 4 lbs in one day is the most ive lost in a day.
so im deff excited about that.
plus, its easy for me not to binge because i know that as soon as im done i can eat whatever, so im not sitting here agonizing over what i cant eat or what i want to eat right now. [right now, i dont want to eat anything but you get my point.]
so im massively bored with life and im going to go watch tv or something.
again.
XOXO Sophia Ruins <3
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Ohhh great job! 4 lbs in one day is so amazing and magical. : ) That's really lame about your family though! I hate when my family leaves before I wake up and don't bother to ask me if I want to go! And it's especially stupid that they pulled the "...because we're going out to eat" BS. Ugh. I'm sorry. : (
ReplyDeleteThanks.
ReplyDeleteAnd keep up the good work! I'm proud of you and your fasting.
they are probably trying to get you to eat they think that if they dont ask you to come eat with them and do fun stuff without you. you will get so bored that you eat with them so thta you can do fun stuff
ReplyDeletewell that would be my guess as it sounds like the sorta shit my mum would do
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i'd hate for you to feel i was on 'their' side but i think you should be glad that they didnt invite you. a lot of your conflict with your mother seems to stem from them forcing you to eat so i think you should be grateful for the times when they choose to sidestep that conflict, even if you do feel left out.
ReplyDeletego on a super long walk. not just for the exercise, but to take up time, help you feel less cagey, get some sun, stay away from temptation, have a cigarette, whatever.
I find sitting at home bored and pissed off is a recipe for disaster... i wish i had someone there to push me the fuck out the door before i start rifling through cupboards!
(i hope that didnt sound as patronising as i fear it did. not my intention at all! and remember, one day, not that far away from now, you can get away from your family. and be free. Work towards that.)x
:[ that's too bad... at least they don't hound you around the house, asking you to study for classes and write essays in the MIDDLE OF THE FUCKING SUMMER. i often wish that my whole family would up and leave without me.
ReplyDeleteOmg what a lame mind game!! Is that the best they can do? lol
ReplyDeleteCan you plan your own fun day without them? Like go to a movie you want to see and wander around shopping afterwards? I'm planning to visit the new chinese gardens they opened in town WITHOUT my flatmate. Stupid boy needs to go home to his mummy and daddy
I thought you didn't enjoy hanging out with your family, so maybe it's a good thing you weren't with them! Stop the conflict, reduce on emotion-based binging, don't get forced to eat fatty food when out eating/shopping/movies... you win!!
ReplyDelete4lbs is fucking awesome! I got excited about a BM-based 1.2lb loss, so you should be v happy!!
I haaaate the line, "Well we didn't think you'd want to..." Why didn't you just ASK??
ReplyDeleteCongratulations on your weight loss and willpower!
ReplyDeleteI know what you mean... I've had a horribly uneventful summer, and it's pushed me from, "Not the most logical, stable girl in the world" to "Fucking bipolar Sylvia Plath chick". Not fun... at least we have school to look forward to?